Loyalty Used to be Lovely

Sep 17

3 min read

20+ years at a company, and the company leaves your family in the lurch.

Growing up politically one way and staying loyal can cause hurt.

People come into your life promising loyalty forever... then leave with a smirk.

What jerks.

In those tough moments, don't let them take your power to proceed with confidence and grace. Even though it can be tough not to give in to human nature's desire for instant gratification. The long game is worth it.

So many clichés come with these life experiences.

Business is business.
This too shall pass.
It'll be worth it in the end.
What is meant for you will not miss you.
Set your sights on the next step.
Take baby steps.
The long game is worth it.
And...so many more...

Clichés almost make us cringe. Do those work, though? Leaning into mantras for mental movement forward? I sincerely believe they do from time to time. It's okay to keep a few in your back pocket as reminders.

Expressing disappointment and grieving one's past relationship, career, family dynamic, health, etc., is a must. Feel the emotions as they come. Don't tamp them down. Embrace them. Ask questions to those who hold safe space with and for you. Healing comes in time and experience. It's a process, but be gentle with yourself as you navigate it. It isn't weak. It's human.

What used to be a 20-30 year career and then security and cost of living comfort isn't a thing any longer. Why? Does it have to do with how folks treat one another and prioritize their loyalty? Was humanity a factor in the process?

Growing up in a red, blue, green, purple, orange, and independent household, did that mentality keep up with what folks are truly loyal to? Humans. Where did our humanity go? Again, where does our loyalty reside? Things, wealth, power? Don't become distracted by shiny things. Humanity is always worth it.

When did we all have the option to walk away from each other as a family? Distance due to jobs, needs, and desires plays into this. Where is the humanity in that? Who will you miss when they're gone, and you weren't present?

Some things are worth making space for to ensure growth and holding loyal to what you believe in...but what is that? Humanity, self-reliance, or the need to obtain more? More what? Does it fulfill you, or will you regret it at the end of this human life when you glance back?

Who are you today?

Why are you that way?

What does it serve? You or humanity?

When will you realize what matters most?

Will it be too late?

Life is full of micromoments that build character. Childlike innocence teaches us one thing when we camp on it. There is right and wrong. Each micromoment helps make something beautiful for you. Are you choosing for the right reasons to ensure fulfillment at the end of this life journey?

Will loyalty serve you well or leave you longing?

~ Brandi ~

Nerd Moment below via AI.

What is Loyalty vs. Unhealthy Fanaticism? Be sure not to confuse the two.

"Loyalty is a strong feeling of commitment, dedication, and steady faithfulness to a person, group, country, or ideal. You can explore the full definition of the word on Merriam-Webster or Dictionary.com. [1, 2, 3]

Types of Loyalty

Interpersonal: Commitment to friends, family members, or romantic partners through good times and bad.
Civic and National: A citizen's duty, allegiance, or oath of support to a country or government.
Organizational and Brand: A customer's or employee's ongoing support for a specific business, team, or company. [1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6]

Key Characteristics

Steadfastness: Remaining supportive even when faced with difficulties or temptations to walk away.
Reciprocity: Often built on shared trust, mutual respect, and honest communication.
Limits: Healthy loyalty respects personal boundaries, whereas blind loyalty can turn into unhealthy fanaticism. [3, 4, 7]

Unhealthy fanaticism is an extreme, obsessive, and uncritical devotion to a person, cause, or belief system that impairs a person's judgment and harms their well-being or relationships.

Key Characteristics

Blind Devotion: Accepting beliefs or following a leader completely without questioning, even when faced with clear evidence of harm or falsehoods.
Inability to Compromise: Viewing the world in strict "us versus them" terms, with absolute intolerance for differing opinions.
Harmful Priorities: Sacrificing personal health, financial stability, or real-life relationships to serve the obsession.
Loss of Identity: Merging one's entire self-worth and identity into the group or cause, leaving no room for independent thought.

Common Contexts

Sports & Entertainment: "Stan" culture or hooliganism, where fans attack critics or rival fans online and offline.
Relationships: Blind loyalty to an abusive partner or a toxic friend, defending harmful behavior at all costs.
Politics & Ideology: Radicalization, where a person views political figures as infallible and cuts off family members who disagree."